Dear Mum and Dad, 

Please stick with me. 

I can’t think clearly right now because there is a rather substantial section of my prefrontal cortex missing. It’s a fairly important chunk, something having to do with rational thought. You see, it won’t be fully developed until I’m about 25. And from where I sit, 25 seems a long way off. For more life lessons check out 

But here’s what i want my parents to know..

My brain is not yet fully developed

It doesn’t matter that I’m smart; even a perfect score on my math test doesn’t insulate me from the normal developmental stages that we all go through. Judgement and intelligence are two completely distinct things. 

And, the same thing that makes my brain wonderfully flexible, creative and sponge-like also makes me impulsive. Not necessarily reckless or negligent but more impulsive than I will be later in life. 

Please stick with me.

So when you look at me like I have ten heads after I’ve done something “stupid” or failed to do something “smart,” you’re not really helping.

You adults respond to situations with your prefrontal cortex (rationally) but I am more inclined to respond with my amygdala (emotionally). And when you ask, “What were you thinking?” the answer is I wasn’t, at least not in the way you are. You can blame me, or you can blame mother nature, but either way, it is what it is.  

At this point in my life, I know that you love me, but my friends are my everything. Please understand that. I choose my friends, but, don’t worry, I am watching you. Carefully. 

Please stick by me. 

Here’s what you can do for me

1. Model adulting. 

I see all the behaviors that you are modeling and I hear all of the words you say. I may not listen but I do hear you. I seem oblivious to your advice.like I’m wearing. If you keep showing me the way, I will follow even if I detour many, many times before we reach our destination. 

2. Let me figure things out for myself. 

If you allow me to experience the consequences of my own actions I will learn from them. Please give me a little bit of leeway and let me know that I can work things out for myself. The more I do, the more confidence and ability I will develop.

3. Tell me about you.

I want you to tell me all the stories of the crazy things you did as a teen, and what you learned from them. Then give me the space to do the same.

Keep reminding me of the big picture. I will roll my eyes at you and make all kinds of grunt-like sounds. I will let you know in no uncertain terms that you can’t possibly understand any of what I’m going through. But I’m listening. I really am. It’s hard for me to see anything beyond the weeds that I am currently mired in. Help me scan out and focus on the long view. Remind me that this moment will pass.

5. Help me to be safe.

Please remind me that drugs and driving don’t mix. Keep telling me that you will help me out of any dangerous situation, no anger, no lectures, no questions asked. But also let me know over and over and over that you are there to listen, when I need you. I need plenty of sleep my brain is still working so fast 

6. Be kind.

I will learn kindness from you and if you are relentless in your kindness to me, someday I will imitate that behavior. Don’t ever mock me, please and don’t be cruel. Humor me-I think I know everything. You probably did as well at my age. Let it go. Being Kind why not look for some end of year teacher gifts

7. Show interest in the things I enjoy.

Some days I will choose to share my interests with you, and it will make me feel good if you validate those interests, by at least acting interested.

One day when the haze of adolescence lifts, you will find a confident, strong, competent, kind adult where a surly teenager once stood. In the meantime, buckle in for the ride. 

and.. Please stick with me. 

Love,

Your Teen 

Its the end of the school year are you looking for inspirational teacher gifts?

For some Homeschool or education advice please visit https://stemplay.net/homeschooling-and-the-family/

for more parenting tips please take a look https://lulagrace.com/2021/07/02/a-parents-guide-to-learning-patience-with-your-kids/